Tag Archives: The Poly Home

Draft of Poly Group Home is Finished

Thanks in part the generous contributions of the PolyonPurpose Patrons, I’ve been able to spend some solid time each week on the next Polyamory on Purpose guide, The Poly Home.

The current plan is for the book to be divided into five sections

  • General information for poly group homes all poly homes
  • Issues and ideas specific to poly group homes
  • Issues and ideas specific to poly couple homes
  • Issues and ideas specific to poly folk living apart from all their poly partners
  • Moving In Together

With the additional time I’ve been able to spend working on the book, last Wednesday I finally completed the section on group homes. If I can continue working at the current pace I anticipate finishing a section a month from now until the first draft is finished.

To wet your appetite, here is the introduction to Poly Group Homes as currently drafted:

 

I read recently that intimacy is really “in-to-me-see.” A reminder that being intimate isn’t just the things we do together, but mostly in seeing and connecting with each other.

The home is the most intimate part of our lives. It is where we let go of our public masks and be ourselves. Our disgusting habits, residual childishness, inner naivete, and everything else that is “us” can come out to play. Living together is an intimate experience. That’s true whether you are lovers, friends, roommates, or strangers stuck in the same dorm. For poly groups living together, sharing that intense intimacy can be a joy and a challenge. There is an old English saying about two women in a house never being in accord. Whether women, men, or non-binary, more people in the house definitely increases the chance of discord.

Nothing can prevent problems cropping up from time to time, but I hope within this section, you will find practical advice on living together that will help avoid some of those problems–as well as just make day-to-day life a little simpler.

And however much risk of discord there is in living together, the “in-to-me-see” of sharing the little day-to-day bits of your lives together is pretty damn awesome.

 

If I can continue working at the current pace, and if editing and formatting don’t give me too many headaches (they usually do) I’ll have the finished book published next January or February. Or if you can’t wait for more, sign up to become a PolyonPurpose Patron and read the drafts as I write them.

The Poly Home

Now that Polyamory and Pregnancy is making its way through the world, I’m starting work on the next Polyamory on Purpose Guide: The Poly Home.

As we all know, the variety of poly relationship structures is nearly endless – as is the variety of living arrangements. I order to make this guide as comprehensive as possible, I’m asking you to share your story. Tell me about your Poly Home. Tell me about the challenges you’re faced, meal planning, sleeping arrangements, how the transition when people move in or move out, or anything else you like. I am particularly interested in hearing from single polies, whose experiences have largely been overlooked in the community.

In case it isn’t clear: I am not talking or writing about only group living situations. Whether you live alone or in a commune, unless your poly partners never come to your home, polyamory affects your home life. And if your partners never come to your home, then you are dealing with the same issues from the other side when you visit their home.

So please, share your thoughts, your stories, your challenges. And what you want to see in a book about the Poly Home.